REMORSE DEFINITION:Distress resulting from guilt over wrongdoing; a desire to undo or fix PHYSICAL SIGNALS AND BEHAVIORS: Heartfelt apologies Asking to talk Following the aggrieved party Repeatedly returning to the scene where a past event took place Keeping the head down as the eyes look up Watering eyes A hand that cups the mouth Holding one’s head in one’s hands Tears that one does not try to hide or control Silence Offering restitution or making promises Using the victim’s name in dialogue when they are present Telling the unvarnished truth Speaking without hesitation when answering A quivering chin Holding the stomach Shoulders that curl over the chest Not defending oneself against attack (verbal or physical) A crumpled body posture Staring down at the floor Clasping the hands together in the lap Shaking Begging for forgiveness Shoulders that quake with repressed sobs A pleading tone A pale or unhealthy complexion Dark circles under the eyes Hollowed cheeks Reaching out to touch and then pulling back, as if one isn’t worthy Readily agreeing to a punishment or pronouncement A voice that cracks Verbalizing responsibility for what happened Giving quiet answers to questions Arms hanging at the sides Still hands and feet Obedience Breaking into sobs Asking others for advice on how to make up for what happened INTERNAL SENSATIONS: A stomach that feels hard A runny nose Nausea Gritty or dry eyes from lack of sleep A lump in the throat MENTAL RESPONSES: Mentally berating oneself over an action or poor decision Wanting to face the consequences Obsessing over finding a way to repay the debt Empathy for the other party and what they are going through Being honest about one’s role in the situation Relief for owning up to wrongdoing ACUTE OR LONG-TERM RESPONSES FOR THIS EMOTION: Weight loss Headaches Heart problems Self-destructive behaviors out of the belief that one does not deserve happiness Desperation to balance the scales or resolve the situation A complete life change (taking up charity work, finding God, etc.) SIGNS THAT THIS EMOTION IS BEING SUPPRESSED: Avoiding friends who are also culpable (if it was a group act) Lying about one’s feelings Claiming that the victim was partly responsible Making an excuse to leave Dropping out of activities, school, or work on false pretenses Moving away MAY ESCALATE TO:Shame,Regret,Desperation,Determination,Devastation,Worthlessness MAY DE-ESCALATE TO:Guilt,Insecurity ASSOCIATED POWER VERBS: Apologize, beg, confess, cower cringe, cry, grieve, grovel implore, languish, muddle, pester plead, seek, shrink, sob surrender, voice, wish WRITER’S TIP:Description is clearest when a writer adheres to the real order of events in a scene. Show the action (stimulus), then the reaction (response), and a reader will clearly see how A leads to B.